A response to "6 things I don't understand about the Fat Acceptance Movement"

There is an article on Thought Catalog floating around about the Fat Acceptance Movement. In it, the author discusses the 6 things she doesn't understand about the FAM. To be honest, I'm not hyper-aware of this movement, probably because I've spent most of my life having my own fat acceptance movement. I will say that she makes some really valid points. Read the whole article (and her follow-up) for yourself. But I also think it's a bit dramatic. When you're comparing extreme ends of a spectrum, it's easy to come to her short-sighted generalizations. But considering the CDC's chart for calculating your BMI leaves a large majority of us struggling to get to a medically "acceptable" number, it's safe to say there are quite a few of us that fall into an "overweight" or "obese" category that most logical thinkers (and even doctors, including my own) think is unrealistic. My doctor has even suggested a target weight for me that leaves me sitting in the "overweight" category. 

I'm not medically educated to give you a professional response to her article. All I can do is speak from experience, and I'm sure those of you with medical backgrounds may disagree with me. But since everyone's body is different, I can say wholeheartedly that I know exactly what my body is capable of. I'm still about 15-20 pounds from where I'd like to be, but the fact that I've already lost about 60 leaves me feeling pretty confident about my experiences in health and fitness. I've done everything the healthy way - no weight loss supplements, pills or extreme diets. Just good old-fashioned exercise and eating right.

1. America is extremely accepting of fat.

Are we? I don't necessarily agree that America is extremely accepting of fat, but that we're extremely tolerant of a sedentary, overindulgent lifestyle. Yes, everything from extra large portions to the lack of physical activity in schools and at home is so incredibly detrimental to the future of our society, and the country continues to perpetuate this lifestyle. It's not good - no, it's definitely not. As a lifestyle choice, we've accepted obesity, accepted sedentary and accepted laziness (to a certain extent - and no, I am not saying that fat people are lazy. Because I am technically "fat" and sure as hell not lazy.)

But, we are sure as hell not socially accepting of "fat people" ("fat" is a term I hate to even use). It's hard to say things like this: 

"Though there may be negative stereotypes, staring, bullying, or crude comments, the environment we live in is one that is incredibly tolerant of unhealthy lifestyles."

You cannot disregard the negative stereotypes, the staring, the bullying and the crude comments and pretend that they're not one of the driving forces behind the "Fat Acceptance Movement." Because the hate that comes from people is toxic and it's no different than the hate people experience from being in any kind of minority or demographic of people that others view as different from themselves. "Fat people" have the same souls, bones and hearts that anyone else has, and nobody knows this better than me.

2. “Body positivity” should include health.

You're damn right, it should. Body positivity should 100% include not only how we look on the outside, but how our insides look as well. Everything from the strength in our muscles to the kindness in our hearts should be part of evaluating your body. And who says it doesn't? I think the primary thought process behind this is that you need to learn to love yourself at any size because you are more than your body. Sure, you're the one living with it every day and if you're overweight or damaging your body, that's on you. But even if you choose to damage your body - be it through food, alcohol, cigarettes or ruining your knees and hips by running multiple marathons a year, you are entitled to the right to love your body. If you don't like your weight, you have the power to change it. But if you choose not to change it, you have the right to love your curves, love your body at any size. You also have a beautiful soul, a beautiful mind and a beautiful heart worth loving just as much as you should your external (and internal) shell. 

Health is both physical and mental. And I can tell you from experience that I ran myself into the ground last year trying to hit a number on the scale - trying to desperately get my BMI to a number it should be. Mentally? It was incredibly exhausting, controlled my life and to an extent, my relationships with others. Mentally, I made a personal decision for my health that it was okay to take a break, okay to be considered "obese" by medical standards as long as I was still treating my body right. And that's okay. It's all about balance.

Body positivity comes from understanding that happiness is not solely found in a number on the scale, a pant size or a BMI calculation. Body positivity comes from understanding that losing 100 pounds will not guarantee automatic happiness. That "fatness" isn't what's making you unhappy - most of us who have gone through any kind of substantial weight loss (and weight gain) can attest to the fact that somewhere along the journey, you learn that happiness isn't synonymous with weight loss - instead, we learn that it's associated with treating our bodies right, pushing ourselves, reaching goals and being the best versions of ourselves that we can be. Weight loss - the scale, your BMI, your pant size - that's all just a fabulous extra. But when the scale plateaus, when we've had an "off week," a bad binge session or you've even gained some weight - that's when the importance of body positivity comes into play. The realization that it's more about learning to love yourself, your body and your own heart along the road to "healthy," even if you don't fit into someone else's definition of it. 

3. “Health at every size” seems physically impossible.

Health at every size is not physically impossible. Yes, when you're comparing extremes at opposite ends of a spectrum, then sure - you have a very solid argument. Anorexia and other eating disorders are not healthy, even if you're a size zero. And being hundreds of pounds overweight while religiously consuming processed food and living a sedentary lifestyle isn't healthy either. But here's my personal tidbit for you:

At my highest weight, I was considered "obese" on the BMI charts. And I was. I ate like shit, didn't work out and deserved every single pound I had. Now, I'm 50 pounds less and because of my height, still considered "obese" on the BMI charts. I eat clean and healthy probably 70-80% of the time, I work out approximately 5 days a week and I can probably do more pushups than you. Are my insides 100% healthy and in the best shape they could be in? Probably not yet. But do I think I'm healthy? Absofuckinglutely. I've run 2 half marathons in pretty great times, regularly participate in bootcamp and try to fuel my body the best way I know how.

What I'm saying is that within reason, you really can be healthy at any size. Is a 350 pound sedentary person who decides to lose weight not "healthy," even though she's lost 100 pounds and is now regularly active, just because she still has another 100 pounds to lose? Maybe not by a flat definition of "healthy," but I guarantee at her yearly checkup, her doctor will give her a standing ovation, tell her she's much healthier than last time and encourage her to continue forward in her journey. It's all about perspective.

4. People are allowed to not be attracted to certain body types.

You're 100% correct. People are allowed not to be attracted to certain body types. And when you're not attracted to someone, you try to be a normal human being and not target that "unattractive" demographic with hateful comments and snarky remarks at a bar about how you "would love to get cozy with her, but she'd probably suffocate you." Yes, that remark was made to me at a rooftop bar in D.C. in 2008. So yes, you're allowed to not be attracted to "fat people," the same way that everyone has a "type" that they're usually interested in. But you're not allowed to be hateful. Because, here's a shocker - fat people have feelings, too.

5. Food addiction is a real medical problem.

It is. There's no way to get around that. The food we put into our body triggers different reactions in our brains, and learning to combat that is really difficult. We should 100% address this, and I have no argument for this one. I've never had an issue with working out - my weight problem has always been attributed to my issues with food, so I really can't even argue this if I tried.

6. Childhood obesity is something we can’t be accepting of.

No, it cannot. You are so right. Especially when our country's demographic of young people are so poorly uninformed about health, weight and the effects of activity and nutrition. Instead of accepting "fat" as the new "okay" for people at any age, we ought to be educating young people, changing their perspectives and encouraging them to treat their bodies like the temples they are. No. Doubt. About. It.

According to the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance, the vision of NAAFA is to have "a society in which people of every size are accepted with dignity and equality in all aspects of life." And quite frankly, the one thing I don't understand about Hall's article is why she didn't just address this. Because there's nothing wrong with wanting that. Sure, is it some backhanded kind of way telling people it's okay to be "fat?" Maybe. And in her follow-up article, she does address the financial liabilities we face as a nation can get expensive. But should we treat people of any size equally? Yes. No questions asked. If you decide to judge, make a rude comment or snarky remark, let it be because someone wronged you, not because you're judging a book by its cover. I have lived "obese" for most of my life, and most of you who know me now wouldn't consider me "obese" for a second. My doctor doesn't consider me "obese" and will willingly admit that BMI is shit anyway. It's all about balance. Most consciously overweight people will struggle internally with their weight for the rest of their lives - the Fat Acceptance Movement aims to promote a sense of self-appreciation despite our flaws and maybe even because of them. And while we all struggle to come to terms with our own self-worth, it's not your fucking job to determine it for us.